Mommy Profile: Bena

Bena has been an avid blogger for almost 2 years at Benaboboli's Weblog.  Before she became a mommy, Bena was working in Boston as an Education Assistant at what used to be the Boston Film/Video Foundation.  She moved back to New York in 2001.

Before kids, Bena loved to edit and learn about filmmaking, and it's still her dream.  She's always been pretty creative and loved to read, write, and educate herself about anything and everything that she had time for.  These days, with the little free time that she has, she blogs and tries to shoot some pool with her husband.  They enjoy each other's company and actually met in a pool hall 18 years ago!

After becoming a mommy, Bena stayed home for about 6 months with her daughter, and then was a waitress for a few months, until she found a job as an Administrative Assistant at an Insurance Company.  Now, Bena lives in North Bergen, NJ with her husband, 8-year-old daughter, and 2-year-old son.  Though they are technically not married yet, she and her husband have been together for about 9 years.

Bena's daily routine is just like that movie "Groundhog Day."  She wakes up around 8 am to get ready for work.  Her husband is unemployed right now--he watches the kids.  Bena works a full-time job but gets out at 5pm, so she has a little time with the kids in the evenings.  Usually, her husband makes dinner when she gets home, and they just watch TV or play with the kids.  Bena's daughter loves to role play and put on skits (since she was 4 years old) and it's a lot of fun, because Bena really gets to see how fast her daughter is growing up.

With one income at the moment, it's not easy to save money.  It's been very stressful the past year, but to make life easier, Bena just writes, every single day.  She always tells her daughter to be thankful for the things she does have, which is exactly what Bena's parents had said to her.  Bena had very little when she was young, and she thinks that was a good thing because when times are tough like this, she's able to survive.

Bena says she doesn't practice the traditions of her Chinese culture as much as she should, but that's because her parents were busy working when she was young.  Bena's very Americanized, but since having her son, she's trying more and more to learn about her ancestors and her country so that she can teach her kids, as well.

Bena can honestly say that she really does have a lot of fun raising her kids and just being a wife and mother.  She used to be a very hyperactive teenager, a social butterfly.  She always had to be out and about, traveling, meeting people, etc.  But she finds that it's really nice to just come home and be with this little family that she's created with her husband and think that she's accomplished something she never imagined she'd ever do.  She never thought she could settle down, and she feels so blessed and loved every day.

These days, Bena finds that the one thing she loves to do by herself is just get in the car, drive to the closest Starbucks, order her usual Iced Venti Red-Eye (Black Iced Coffee with a shot of espresso), open up her little Dell netbook, and just write.  She finds it very therapeutic!